The downtime afterwards. You wonder, will it be different? Have I been affected? Will those unfinished conversations be continued?
Einstein and Newton. Discovery versus invention. The big show-down. So I came up with a very rough categorisation. Science is all about discovery. You don’t invent gravity. You don’t invent electromagnetism. You might invent some equations (sort of) or ways of thinking about it, but mostly you discover that shit.
Tools and entertainment and stuff. They is invented. Like, imagine the internet being discovered. Hey look guys! There’s all these wires lying about, and if we plug in, we can access porn! Engineering, designing, art. Still confusing, the boundary. Explore the extremes and their nature will become apparent. Are we exploring ourselves or the outside world? Sharing old ideas or imagining brand new things?
Still, you might discover possibilities. Or that certain things actually work or can be improved. Then there’s something like calculus. Was it always there waiting to be found? Or was it a brilliant stroke of genius? Maths lies on this cusp. But really, I think they’re interrelated and shit. Discovention. Or inventiery. Or something. All part of the software development cycle, my dear. But yes, it seems mathematics may exist in its own little world, perfectly sitting between my dream and yours.
Religion versus science. I don’t get it. I don’t have any specific “beliefs”. I kind of figure it out as I go along. I’ve always found the concept of God confusing in very much the same way as I’ve found elements confusing. How do I know they exist? Plenty of good ideas may come of them but I haven’t gotten a good personal handle on them yet. I’m fully capable of indoctrinating myself or learning all the rules. But I’m unsatisfied with what I’ve seen so far. In both cases I’ve experienced many contradictory explanations. Scientists can’t make up their mind what an atom is.
Anyway. To say one is better than the other is illogical. They measure things differently. One values a vague concept of faith. The other values a vague concept of the scientific method. They ask different questions and answer different questions. What do you hope to learn by looking into other peoples’ minds? I find it disturbing that people can summarise their beliefs so simply and efficiently. To give in to society and all of its factual values and rules is intellectual suicide. I just watched High School Musical by the way! Awesome it was! Brad Gavin is this century’s comedic genius (so far).
For a long time I’ve felt weird about having to tip-toe around the truth. You can’t say if someone’s fat. Or if heaven is a ridiculous idea. Or that taking religion seriously isn’t crazy. Being passionate is one thing but being “deeply offended” when people joke about you or your beliefs is self-righteous and pretentious. If you dismiss religion, you should also dismiss physics.
I hate how people talk so clearly, with such delicate diction on some boring subject, and then they mention someonefamousandrushrightthroughtheirnamesoyoucan’tunderstandit and then they continue again normally. WHAT THE FUCK? SLOW THE FUCK DOWN! I haven’t heard of whoever the fuck you mentioned. Why do we suck so much at teaching? Emphasise the right parts for crying out loud. I tracked down Zener through amazing Googling skills. But this guy just mumbles it. Doesn’t repeat it.
Letter combinations endlessly opening up directions. Unfollowed because I missed their signals. I didn’t realise what was just around the corner. Feeling exhausted and all the more frustrated. Not the good kind of action.
Once the duality is found and understood, then what? What is the next step? I don’t try to do it, it comes to me. It enhances your experience of life. You needn’t be afraid anymore. You can see the different sides to things. Master how to use them. How to bring out the good side of something. How to rotate things, manipulate them. We are gods. Why do we act like we shouldn’t play god? As soon as you make a decision, as soon as you create something, put some things together, you’re a god. It’s your inherent rights and responsibilities. We fear playing god because we don’t like thinking and feeling. We like to be controlled. If you have morals and deep emotional understanding of yourself and your world, you are comfortable changing your world. Being in charge and leading the way. Claiming your rightful place. If god wanted us to fly, he would have made us clever enough to invent airplanes.